The Love Police: Transcript

Charles Veitch
Danny Shine

[London, England]

TV NEWS COMMENTATOR: It’s the biggest counter-terrorism operation in almost two years. Twelve men have been arrested, though I understand one could be released soon. Where yesterday there were dramatic armed raids, today there were meticulous searches. As a small army of scene of crime officers set to work in Manchester, Liverpool and Clitheroe in Lancashire. Once again, intelligence had suggested terrorists had been planning an attack on Britain. One source close to the investigation told me they feared it was very big and would have been very soon.

UNDERGROUND STATION ANNOUNCEMENT: This train is formed of two coaches...Platform 8 is for the 22:28 seven service to East...via Lewis....serviced from the ticket area.


BLACK WOMAN: ...we’re having a conversation. End of discussion.

WHITE WOMAN: No, I can say what I want.

BLACK WOMAN: No, that’s what I’m saying. You cannot tell me to go away. What sense does that make?

WHITE WOMAN: Don’t tell me I’m boring then.

BLACK WOMAN: But you are. I’m sorry. This is what I’m trying to say to you.

GORDON BROWN, UK PRIME MINISTER: I think the New World Order is emerging, and with it the foundations of a new and progressive...[April, 2009]






DANNY SHINE: My paperwork?

POLICE OFFICER: Yeah, what you got there?

DANNY SHINE: That’s just a sign. A sign. I’ll show you. It’s an arrow, and it’s actually telling you that you have to move to the left

CHARLES VEITCH: Ladies, this is the Love Police. We will be checking you all for smiles in a second.

POLICE OFFICER: I suggest you put the megaphones down and stop protesting, please.

DANNY SHINE: You are suggesting that I put my megaphone down and stop protesting. I am not protesting. I am just speaking through a megaphone. And what I do is give people like you hugs. All you need is a hug. No, you do need a hug. Who would like me to give him a hug? Say, “Yes.”


DANNY SHINE: Yes, sir. Yes, sir. Keep it calm. Keep it calm.

CHARLES VEITCH: Ladies and gentlemen, please lower your adrenaline levels. This is a love and compassion presentation by the Love Police.

CHARLES VEITCH: Ladies and gentlemen, this is a message from the Ministry for Health, Propaganda and Swine Flu Information. Swine flu is incredibly dangerous and it is now transmittable through eye contact or smiling at people. Stay miserable. Keep reading newspapers. Keep watching mainstream media on the TV. You are not a unique and beautiful snowflake. You are a consumer. Go back to sleep. Your government is in control.

DANNY SHINE: Thinking is boring. Thinking is hard work and it’s not worth the energy. So, if you ever get tempted to think for yourself, quickly distract yourself. Buy a newspaper, watch television.

CHARLES VEITCH: I prefer not to think about reality. I like to stay infantile and read about fashionable things, and Hollywood and Lindsay Lohan and, uh, her girlfriend who she broke up with because these are the important things.

CHARLES VEITCH: Thank you for choosing to work in a corporate zone, eat corporate food, drink in a corporate bar and invest money in arms trade. You do not need to worry or have an opinion about killing people because the mainstream media is doing it for you. So go back to sleep, earn your nice salary. Everything is fine. You are just a flesh and bone human being, there is nothing more to life. Have another beer and carry on.

DANNY SHINE: Ladies and gentlemen, you do look quite relaxed. This is not what’s meant to be. You should be worried. Statistically speaking, the person next to you is either a terrorist or has swine flu. So please, stop looking so happy and relaxed, and move quickly to your next shopping experience. You are wasting shopping time by standing here, madam.

POLICE OFFICER: OK, have you got any problem with me just taking your details.

CHARLES VEITCH: Yes, I do. I do not wish to give my details.

POLICE OFFICER: You do not wish to give your details.

CHARLES VEITCH: Yeah, I just politely decline.

POLICE OFFICER: You politely decline.

POLICE OFFICER: Just because we’ve had a chat, you don’t want to give me any of your details.

CHARLES VEITCH: Oh, no, no. It’s a matter of principle. I answer only to the Absolute.

POLICE OFFICER: You enjoy, I would say, making a nuisance of yourself.

CHARLES VEITCH: The truth is, to speak out against lies and murder, it fills me with joy, it makes me feel closer to my fellow man. The fact that someone has a bit of sanity to come out here and just cut through the B.S. It just makes me feel really alive to have no fear, to be full of love, to spread my message, which I believe is a message of good.

DANNY SHINE: You are not divine beings. What you are, are consumers. Please, consume, consume, consume until we have no planet left to consume. What you need to do is buy things that you don’t need. That’s the best way to support the economy. Smiling is bad for the economy. Please do not smile. Sir, wipe that off your face.

CHARLES VEITCH: We feel that, in the very near future, the state—as in the government and the private banks which run the state—are going to ask you guys, normal human beings who are normal family people outside of uniform, to control us. They’re going to use slaves to control other slaves. Because we’re all slaves in the livestock management programme.

CHARLES VEITCH: Ladies and gentlemen, this is a lesson in absolute reality. What we have here is a group of people giving you an alternate message, and very quickly Agent Smith and Agent Smith of the Matrix have decided to turn up in nice fluorescent jackets and question what we are doing. They were questioning how long we wish to be here, who is in charge, and what our purpose is. Until we break the law, they have no authority over us, nor you. You are free. You were born free. You will die free. And there is no...authority on this Earth. Power to the people.

CHARLES VEITCH: Swine flu is an illusion. Terrorism is an illusion. If you are not scared, you will not contract swine flu. You are not swine, you are divine human beings.

CHARLES VEITCH: No, we’re not going to get in the van. You’re not going to kidnap us, no. No, we’re not going to get in the van. We’ve not broken...

POLICE OFFICER: Go over to it.

CHARLES VEITCH: No, I’m not going to go over to it.

DANNY SHINE: This is nothing personal, and I’m going to show you how much this is nothing personal.

CHARLES VEITCH: Ladies and gentlemen, the true thing is, I know we’re creating a scene, but creating a scene is not illegal. You were born free, you will live free, you will die free. You’re allowed to make a scene, you’re allowed to scream for joy. You’re allowed to complain, you’re allowed to cry. You’re allowed to love people, you’re allowed to hug people. And we’re starting to live in a world where we’re starting to feel scared. We’re starting to forget just how divine and special we are as human beings. Every single one of you is the only example of you that will ever exist, and there’s not a single authority on this world that can tell you how to behave at any time, anyplace, anywhere. You are free, you will live free, you will die free. The only chains that exist are in your mind. You can do anything you want if you put your mind to it.

DANNY SHINE: You haven’t been brainwashed and conditioned, have you? No, it’s all the others. You’re not crazy, you’re normal. It’s the man with the megaphone. He’s crazy. So if you see a man with a megaphone in the street, he’s probably an attention seeker. Do not give attention seekers any attention. It just makes them do it more.

CHARLES VEITCH: Thank you all, the City drones, for working for big corporations. Very soon we’ll bring about the corporate dream where every single person dresses the same, looks the same, feels the same, thinks the same, earns the same money. We too can sit at a desk for 10 hours a day giving our minds over to a machine. This is the most fulfilling thing in the world and thank you for not questioning your reality. This is a message from the Ministry for Truth and Propaganda. Thank you for staying as sheep.

DANNY SHINE: We are here to brighten up the day of the police and the security department because, quite honestly, looking out for terrorists must get a bit tedious.

CHARLES VEITCH: Have you ever had to taser anyone yet? Have you tasered anyone yet with your high-powered electric torture weapon? You’d probably like to taser me.

DANNY SHINE: Shopping is what you are here to do. You were born to shop, and you will die to shop. Please, move swiftly to your next shopping experience and don’t hang around here.

CHARLES VEITCH: Terrorism, terrorism, terrorism, Al-Qaeda, Mohammed, terrorism, terrorism, war in Iraq, war in Afghanistan, Al-Qaeda, Osama Bin Laden, Tora Bora, Afghanistan, terrorism, stay scared, stay separate. Terror, terror, terror. Terror is bad, you are bad. Go shopping. Stay scared.

DANNY SHINE: She said can I move beyond the pillars because I’m not allowed to do this because it’s private property. So, anyway, ladies and gentlemen, if you think I should be allowed to continue up here with the megaphone, say: “Yeah.”

CROWD: Yeah.

DANNY SHINE: I think you’ve been outnumbered, madam. But let’s wait until the police come along and have some fun.

CHARLES VEITCH: Hello. Hey, it’s from yesterday.

POLICE OFFICER: Good to see you.

CHARLES VEITCH: How are you doing?

DANNY SHINE: Ladies and gentlemen, if you haven’t noticed, three actors have arrived in costume. They are acting policemen.

POLICE OFFICER: You should actually go down to the bottom of the steps.



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